Why Stories Are the Best Way to Teach Children About Gender Parity

Children have an irritatingly effective way of finding holes in adult logic.

Tell a child that “girls and boys are exactly the same”, and there is every possibility she will immediately point out three ways in which she and her brother are different. Or he will tell you that the fastest runner in his class is a girl, he’s better at maths, she’s taller and neither of them can draw to save their lives.

And just like that, your carefully prepared lesson on gender equality has gone completely off the rails.

Perhaps that’s because sameness isn’t really the lesson we need to teach.

Biological diversity between genders is a given. Individual differences are even greater. Children have different bodies, personalities, strengths, interests and abilities.

Gender parity doesn’t require us to pretend those differences don’t exist.

It requires us to ensure that opportunity isn’t determined by gender.

And at Biplobworld, we believe one of the best ways to help children understand that distinction is through something they already love—stories.

Quick Answer: What Does Gender Parity Mean for Children?

Gender parity means teaching children that girls and boys may be different, and every individual certainly is, but interests, ambitions, responsibilities and opportunities should not be restricted simply because someone is a girl or boy.

Rather than lecturing children about equality, stories allow them to experience the idea through characters, adventures, humour and situations they understand.

Entertainment comes first.

The lesson follows naturally.

That’s the philosophy behind Biplobworld’s Girls = Boys, Each Unique series on Gender Parity.

Equality Doesn’t Mean Everyone Is the Same

This distinction is important.

A girl doesn’t have to be good at football to prove girls are equal to boys. A boy doesn’t have to enjoy cooking to demonstrate that boys can cook.

Perhaps she loves football. Perhaps she hates it.

Perhaps he’d happily spend Sunday afternoon baking a cake. Perhaps he’d rather dismantle the toaster—which presents an entirely different parenting problem.

The point is that they should have the opportunity to find out.

Gender parity is not about replacing old stereotypes with new expectations. It is about removing the unnecessary barriers in the first place.

A girl should be encouraged to explore science because she is curious about science, not because she needs to prove that girls can become scientists.

A boy should be free to be caring and emotionally expressive because those are human qualities, not female ones.

Equal opportunity. Unique individuals.

Which rather neatly explains the name of our series: Girls = Boys, Each Unique.

Why Stories Work Better Than Lectures

Adults love explaining things to children.

Children aren’t always quite as enthusiastic about being explained to.

We have seen the same thing while trying to inculcate environmental awareness. Telling a child to save water because “we must protect the environment” can result in the inevitable but why? The idea becomes meaningful only when the child develops some connection with nature and therefore has something she actually wants to protect.

Gender equality isn’t very different.

Tell a six-year-old that society must eliminate gender stereotypes and you’ve probably lost her somewhere around “society”.

Give her an entertaining story about a character who is underestimated simply because she’s a girl, and suddenly the idea becomes real.

The child isn’t memorising equality.

She’s experiencing unfairness.

Better still, she gets to reach the conclusion herself.

“That’s not fair!”

Those four words can be far more powerful than a page-long explanation of gender parity.

Entertainment First. Lesson Second.

This is central to how we approach children’s stories at Biplobworld.

The story has to work as a story first.

Children should want to know what happens next. There needs to be adventure, humour, curiosity, surprise and perhaps a little chaos—because things going completely according to plan rarely make for an interesting children’s book.

The lesson should emerge from what happens.

Not arrive carrying a large sign saying MORAL OF THE STORY.

That’s the thinking behind the wider Biplob Books series and particularly Girls = Boys, Each Unique.

The Gender Parity series explores different facets of equality through entertaining media and stories. Instead of repeatedly telling children what gender parity means, the stories create situations where they can see assumptions being challenged and individual strengths emerging naturally.

Somewhere between enjoying the characters and wondering what happens next, the idea quietly settles in.

Stories Give Children a Safe Place to Question Stereotypes

Stories also create distance.

Instead of asking a child directly what she thinks about gender discrimination, we can talk about a character.

Why wasn’t she given a chance?

Why did everyone think he couldn’t do that?

Was that fair?

What would you have done?

Suddenly, an Important Parenting Conversation doesn’t feel particularly important at all.

It’s just two people discussing a story.

And that’s often when the most interesting conversations happen.

We’ve seen this in other areas of parenting too. Shared activities—whether playing games, travelling or simply spending time together—often open up conversations that formal attempts at “quality time” don’t.

Reading together offers exactly the same opportunity.

The trick is not to ruin it afterwards.

Please resist closing the book and immediately asking:

“So, what did you LEARN?”

Your child has not just completed an examination.

Sometimes simply ask, “What did you think?”

Then listen.

Gender Parity Benefits Boys Too

Gender equality conversations often focus, understandably, on the barriers girls face.

But stereotypes restrict boys as well.

If girls shouldn’t hear “you can’t do that because you’re a girl”, boys shouldn’t hear its equivalent either.

Girls can lead.

Boys can nurture.

Girls can build.

Boys can dance.

And, importantly, none of them have to.

A boy who loves cricket isn’t reinforcing a stereotype. A girl who doesn’t enjoy science hasn’t failed gender equality.

The objective is freedom of opportunity, not compulsory rebellion against convention.

Give children a broad range of experiences and let them discover what fascinates them.

We have seen this principle work beautifully with nature. Introduce children to the outdoors and one may become fascinated by insects while another spends her time looking for animals on the forest floor. The parent’s role isn’t to dictate what should interest them. It is to create the opportunity for discovery.

Gender-neutral opportunity works much the same way.

Open the door. Let the child decide whether to walk through it.

Stories Need Real-Life Backup

Of course, even the finest book can’t do everything.

Children watch us.

If they read stories about gender equality but continually see rigid gender roles enforced at home, they will eventually notice the contradiction.

That doesn’t mean household responsibilities need to be divided with the precision of an Excel spreadsheet.

It simply means children should see that tasks aren’t automatically assigned according to gender.

Dad can cook.

Mum can fix something.

A daughter can help wash the car.

A son can care for a younger sibling.

Or precisely the reverse.

As we’ve found with environmental learning, setting an example is often more effective than repeatedly telling children what they ought to do.

Stories plant the seed.

Everyday life reinforces it.

Girls = Boys. Each Unique.

Ultimately, the lesson of gender parity is beautifully simple.

Girls and boys don’t need to be identical to be equal.

Differences exist. We should celebrate them rather than pretend otherwise.

What shouldn’t exist are artificial ceilings over children’s ambitions, interests and opportunities simply because of their gender.

As parents and educators, our job isn’t to decide who our children should become. It is to give them enough room to discover that for themselves.

And stories give us a wonderful way to begin.

Funny stories. Exciting stories. Adventures children actually want to read.

Stories where nobody realises that somewhere between the laughter, excitement and turning of pages, an important idea has quietly made itself at home.

That’s what we aim to do through the Biplob Books series and Girls = Boys, Each Unique.

Entertain first. Let the lesson emerge organically.

FAQs

How do you explain gender parity to a child?

Explain that boys and girls can be different, just as every person is different, but gender shouldn’t decide what opportunities someone receives or what interests they are encouraged to explore.

Why are stories effective for teaching gender equality?

Stories let children see ideas such as fairness, stereotypes and equal opportunity play out through characters and situations. This allows children to form their own conclusions rather than simply memorising what adults tell them.

Does gender equality mean boys and girls are the same?

No. Gender equality doesn’t require biological or individual sameness. It means differences should not become arbitrary barriers to education, interests, ambitions or opportunities.

What is Girls = Boys, Each Unique?

Girls = Boys, Each Unique is Biplobworld’s Gender Parity series, using entertaining stories to explore different aspects of equality, individuality and gender-neutral opportunity in ways young readers can naturally understand.