{"id":1478,"date":"2026-09-12T06:12:13","date_gmt":"2026-09-12T06:12:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/biplobworld.com\/biplobworld\/?p=1478"},"modified":"2026-09-13T06:50:38","modified_gmt":"2026-09-13T06:50:38","slug":"true-leadership-means-choosing-ability-not-gender","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/biplobworld.com\/biplobworld\/true-leadership-means-choosing-ability-not-gender\/","title":{"rendered":"True Leadership Means Choosing Ability, Not Gender"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

“Who should be captain?”<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ask a group of children this question and you may receive some interesting answers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The best player.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The oldest child.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The loudest one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The person everyone likes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or, occasionally, the child answering the question.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fair enough. Confidence is useful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But leadership\u2014and deciding who should take responsibility\u2014becomes much more interesting when children learn to ask a different question:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Who is best suited for what we need to do?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not who is the boy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not who is the girl.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not who traditionally gets the job.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Who has the right skills?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It’s a simple question, but one that sits at the heart of genuine gender parity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Quick Answer: How Can We Teach Children Gender-Neutral Leadership?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Teach children to recognise ability, effort, judgement and teamwork before gender<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leadership doesn’t always mean being the person in charge, either. Sometimes good leadership means recognising that somebody else is better suited to a particular task\u2014and supporting them wholeheartedly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s the lesson at the heart of True Leadership<\/strong>, the third story in Biplobworld’s Girls = Boys, Each Unique<\/a><\/strong> series.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leadership Isn’t Always About Being in Front<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

We often present leadership to children as something very visible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The captain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The class monitor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The person giving instructions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The one holding the trophy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But some of the most valuable leadership happens when somebody is prepared to say:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“You’re better at this than I am. You should do it.”<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

That requires confidence of a different kind.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In True Leadership<\/a><\/strong>, Avantika, Adi, Asif and Riya have worked hard preparing for their school pickleball trials. Riya has developed an excellent backhand. Avantika is exceptionally fast around the court. The children have practised together enough to understand one another’s strengths.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then comes the match that matters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And suddenly, recognising those strengths becomes more important than ego.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Best Player Should Play<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

During the final, the team needs to decide which two players should contest the decisive third game.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Avantika suggests that she and Riya pair up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Adi immediately sees the logic: Riya’s backhand combined with Avantika’s speed could be a formidable combination. Asif agrees that the girls are playing particularly well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So Avantika and Riya take the court.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No grand speech.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No debate about whether boys or girls are naturally better players.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No sulking because somebody didn’t get picked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The team simply chooses the players they believe give them the best chance of winning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That is equality in practice.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Merit Is Gender Neutral<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

This is perhaps one of the most important gender-parity lessons we can give children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Equal opportunity doesn’t mean choosing a girl because<\/em> she’s a girl.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nor does it mean automatically choosing a boy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It means gender stops being the deciding factor when it has nothing to do with the job.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the strongest candidate is a girl, choose her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If it’s a boy, choose him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If a child has the best idea, listen to it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If someone else has more experience, let that person take responsibility.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Merit doesn’t need a gender attached to it.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And children can understand this remarkably well when we give them concrete situations rather than abstract lectures.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Watch Who We Automatically Put in Charge<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Adults sometimes reinforce leadership stereotypes without noticing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Imagine four children building something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do we instinctively ask the boy to handle the tools?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If children are organising a game, do we expect the most confident boy to lead?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When something technical goes wrong, whom do we call over?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Children notice these tiny signals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And repeated often enough, they can start associating authority, technical competence or physical confidence with one gender.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The solution isn’t to automatically put girls in charge instead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s simply exchanging one assumption for another.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ask:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Who knows how to do this?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or even better:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Does anyone know how to do this?”<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Give children the chance to surprise you.<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

They frequently will.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Good Teammates Don’t Feel Threatened by Someone Else’s Ability<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

There’s another aspect of True Leadership<\/em> that I particularly like.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Adi and Asif don’t merely allow<\/em> Avantika and Riya to play.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They support them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Earlier, Adi has made costly errors by trying to hit too hard. Asif also becomes erratic in his match. Meanwhile, Avantika is playing brilliantly, hitting important winners.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So when the decisive game arrives, the children look at what is actually happening rather than what they might prefer to believe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The girls are the best combination.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Send them in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That takes maturity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because equality isn’t only about giving somebody else an opportunity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes it’s about being comfortable when somebody else is better than you<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s a useful lesson for boys and girls alike.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Confidence Doesn’t Have to Come at Someone Else’s Expense<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

We quite rightly want confident children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But confidence doesn’t need to mean constantly proving:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“I’m the best.”<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

A confident child can recognise another person’s strengths without feeling diminished by them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A confident boy doesn’t need a girl to be less capable for him to feel capable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A confident girl doesn’t need to prove she’s better than every boy before she deserves to be taken seriously.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That distinction matters enormously.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gender parity isn’t a competition between boys and girls.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It’s about creating a world where children can develop their abilities without gender deciding beforehand what those abilities are supposed to be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leadership Also Means Bringing Out the Best in Others<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

A good team doesn’t need four people with identical skills.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Quite the opposite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In True Leadership<\/em>, the children’s different strengths complement one another. Avantika has speed. Riya has her backhand. Through practice, they learn how to use those differences together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We can encourage the same thinking in everyday childhood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One child may be good at organising.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another comes up with creative ideas.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One remains calm when everything goes wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another can persuade everyone to keep going.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instead of asking children only, “Who is the leader?”<\/em>, try asking:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“What does each person bring to the team?”<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now leadership becomes less about status and more about contribution.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let Children See Women Leading Normally<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Representation matters most when it stops feeling unusual.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the previous story, Sweep and Mop<\/strong>, Ritika is the expert coach who designs the children’s training. In True Leadership<\/em>, Avantika and Riya become the pair trusted with the deciding game.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Neither situation requires an announcement that girls can lead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They simply do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Children benefit from seeing women as coaches, scientists, entrepreneurs, teachers, engineers and decision-makers\u2014and men as teachers, carers, cooks and nurturers\u2014not as exceptions designed to make a point, but as ordinary life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The less remarkable it becomes, the more successful the lesson probably is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And Sometimes Leadership Means Cheering From the Sidelines<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Avantika and Riya win the deciding game convincingly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At the end, Biplob does something unexpected.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He congratulates Adi and Asif.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because when the important decision arrived, they followed the logic of the team rather than assuming that, as boys, they should have a better chance of winning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As Asif puts it, they are a team and the best players took the court that day<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s a lovely definition of leadership for children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes you lead from the front.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes you recognise somebody else’s ability.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And sometimes you stand on the sidelines and cheer as loudly as you possibly can.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let Ability Have the Final Word<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

We cannot tell children that everyone is equally good at everything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They aren’t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nor should gender equality require us to pretend they are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What we can teach them is something much more useful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Everyone deserves the opportunity to develop their abilities.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And when the time comes to choose a captain, player, leader, helper or problem-solver, look at what the job actually requires.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Choose the person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not the gender.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s the lesson running through True Leadership<\/a><\/strong>, the third story in Biplobworld’s Girls = Boys, Each Unique<\/a><\/strong> series.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because true equality isn’t about ensuring girls always win.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And true leadership isn’t about ensuring boys always lead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It’s about having enough confidence to recognise ability wherever you find it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even when that means handing someone else the racquet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

FAQs<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

How can parents teach children about gender and leadership?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Give boys and girls opportunities to lead, make decisions and solve problems. When choosing someone for a responsibility, discuss the skills needed rather than making assumptions based on gender.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Does gender equality mean choosing girls over boys?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

No. Gender equality means providing equitable opportunities and judging people according to relevant skills, effort and merit rather than automatically favouring either gender.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What does merit-based inclusion mean for children?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

In simple terms, it means giving everyone a fair chance and choosing people for roles based on their abilities and what the situation requires\u2014not whether they are boys or girls.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How can stories help teach leadership?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Stories allow children to watch characters make decisions and experience their consequences. In True Leadership<\/a><\/strong>, from Biplobworld’s Girls = Boys, Each Unique<\/a><\/strong> series, the lesson emerges naturally when the team chooses its strongest combination for the decisive pickleball game.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Who should be captain?” Ask a group of children this question and you may receive some interesting answers. The best player. The oldest child. The loudest one. The person everyone likes. Or, occasionally, the child answering the question. Fair enough. Confidence is useful. 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